Florida 2008

Family vacations can always be hard to manage. Because let's be honest, every family has their issues. And my family is certainly no exception. Yet, when push comes to shove and we manage to (finally) make it to our vacation destination, we always end up having a good time. Sure, there are always some tense moments, but hey, they wouldn't be family if you didn't occasionally want to put them in a choke-hold.

Obligatory Florida beach shot

Not only was this a family vacation, but this was also the first time that my siblings and I were permitted to bring our significant others on vacation with the family. So that introduced a new element into the vacation, because it was evident that some of my family members were biting their tongues to keep from blowing up in front of the "guests" (although let it be known--my family all wears their emotions on their sleeves, so no one was really hiding anything, it was just making other people awkward because the issue was being blatantly ignored).

Darrell always has such a great eye for taking photos... Love this shot of the tree and dock!

We did learn a few things on this vacation about finding that happy medium between traveling with the family and traveling with significant others. And while some of the things we learned are certainly reflective of how my family operates, I know there are other similar families out there (at least that's what I always tell myself so I don't feel bad), so hopefully they can take a page out of our book and learn from some of our successes and failures.

One of the most important elements of having an enjoyable family vacation is make sure there is at least one activity that all parties are included in and like to do.

I swear we are actually playing cards, not just drinking

Even if your family is like my family and loves to plan excursions for Every. Day. of the vacation, there will still undoubtably be down time. Plus, if you are all staying in the same vacation home (like we were), it's pretty hard to isolate yourself from the group to pass the down time. Thankfully, my family is one of those families that gets into cards and board games, so we always make sure to have some around (and trust me--cards are great time-killers in airports as well). And, if your family is really like mine and has to do EVERYTHING together when on vacation, make sure to take advantage of the local facilities and attractions to break up the monotony of the same-old same-old activities. Oh, and pitting couples against couples is always a great way to brew excitement in the activity and keep people interested.

Couples tennis anyone?

This is really a location-specific tip, but if you are vacationing somewhere that offers deep-sea fishing tours, you should definitely consider doing one. As long as no one in your family has a strong aversion to fish or bad seasickness, these trips are a blast. Most charters have a variety of trips available as well, so you will be able to select one that best fits your interests. Since we weren't all gung-ho about doing an overnight adventure (although you do have the opportunity to catch some wicked cool fish), we went out on one of their standard day trips where they pretty much guarantee everyone will catch something. And trust me, they don't lie. 

This wasn't even all of the fish we caught!

One of the other great things about these trips is that after you dock, the crew will clean the fish for you and give you tips on how to prepare them. And then you will have some good eatin' that night.

There was one definite area of friction on the trip, however. As I've mentioned, my family has the vacation mindset of "everyone or no one" when it comes to activities. Serious deliberation (usually too much) is put into every decision because we have to all agree on the same thing so that no one feels slighted or left out. There is no splitting up or having people branch off on their own. And when we would travel just the five of us, this usually wasn't an issue. But I soon discovered that when I had my significant other along, I was more inclined to want some down time that wasn't a "full-family" activity. So when Darrell and I decided we wanted to go for a walk on the beach one evening while the rest of the family was sitting down to play cards, we got some pretty displeased looks from other family members (but it paid off in some pretty awesome photos!).

I've since talked with my mom and sister (the two who really cared), and we've come to the understanding that sometimes when we travel, especially with our significant others, the couples might want to spend some time alone because after all, this is a vacation for them as well. So I would highly recommend that if you preparing for that monumental first family vacation with a significant other, make sure you and your family are on the same page with expectations for how and with whom people will spend their time.

If this really doesn't sound like the vacation style of your family and really isn't helpful at all, stay tuned later this week as I recap vacations with Darrell's family--which are about as polar opposite as you can be compared to my family's vacations!